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Here are five micro-expressions you need to know when you’re talking to somebody to see how the conversation is being perceived and to help you get the results you want. Whether you’re building a relationship with your clients, prospects, employees, or you’re talking to your friends, significant other or kids.
1. Disgust. What does disgust look like? Crinkling the nose and showing the upper teeth. That means they don’t like what you’re saying. Notice what you’re saying in that moment move away from it or dig deeper to find out why they are disgusted by it.
2. Anger. Eyebrows are tense, eyelids are tight, the top lip is tense, whatever you’re showing them, it is upsetting them. They’re getting angry about it. You could be pushing too hard if you’re selling to them. This is their sign without them using any words that they are no longer engaging with you and they do not like what you’re saying or they do not like what you’re doing. So stop doing it and shift gears to get them to calm down and be in rapport with you.
3. Happy, my favorite emotion! Easy to see this micro-expression but it happens at a glance. You’ve got to be quick looking for it. This is when the cheekbone reaches the eyes and the smile lines show. Whatever you’re showing them, talking about at that moment when you see that micro-expression you know they’re truly happy. Keep doing it! Keep bringing them into that feeling. That is a green light for you.
4. Fear. When we are fearful, what do we do? We pull back the tissue around our eyes to see everything around us. There’s usually a little gasp with it and we breathe in. If you’re showing them something, maybe it’s a price, or you’re trying to encourage them to do public speaking, and they’re scared to death of it and you see that micro-expression then stop. Tweak what you’re doing, make them feel comfortable. Bring them back into their body and out of their head. Then you can start working towards your goal of the conversation.
5. Contempt. Looks like a sideways smile, a smirk. This means that they’re being pessimistic. They’re not on board with what you’re saying. They’re really not buying into this. You don’t have them on board with you so, stop whatever you’re doing, whatever you just said, whatever you just showed them, and get them back into rapport with you and then you can move on.
These are five micro-expressions that you need to be looking for when you’re doing any sort of conversation where you’re trying to get the other person onboard with you. If it’s a conversation with a client, a prospect, your employees, your spouse, your kids, you can use this “tool” in any area to help you get the results you’re looking for.
I would love it if you would share this out on social media, or send this out to your friends, family, coworkers, whoever needs to hear this message. It is my mission to help people build deeper relationships in their professional lives. This tip helps in your personal life too. If you would help me with that mission I would truly appreciate it.
If you do nothing else today….remember to smile because happy looks good on you. Have an amazing day!
Hugs and high 5’s,
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- When the month’s done, evaluate it and tweak what’s not working.
Don’t forget to check out our previous blog post:
- You did what with your body? Non-verbal communication you need to know!
- You did what with your hands? Non-verbal communication you need to know!
- Get their attention with these corporate holiday gift ideas that will fit your budget and make you memorable!